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Finding Calm When You’re Used to Feeling Overwhelmed

Nancy Williams-Foley • 27 March 2025

Finding Calm When You’re Used to Feeling Overwhelmed

If you’ve been living with a sense of constant pressure - mentally, emotionally, or physically - you’re not alone. Maybe your mind starts racing the moment you open your eyes. Maybe your body feels tense, like it’s bracing for something that hasn’t happened yet. Maybe the weight of everything you’re holding - responsibilities, emotions, unspoken worries, just feels like too much.


πŸ’› I want you to know: it doesn’t have to be this way.


When overwhelm becomes your everyday, it can feel like calm is something other people get to experience - not you. You might even start to believe that you’re just wired this way… always anxious, always alert, always trying to keep things together.


But you’re not broken. You’re human. And your body, your mind, your nervous system, they’ve just been trying to keep you safe in the best way they know how.


What If Calm Isn’t So Far Away?

Try to imagine, just for a moment…

✨ Waking up without the tightness in your chest.

✨ Feeling your breath land softly, instead of feeling like it’s stuck in your throat.

✨ Moving through your day with more steadiness, less urgency.


It might feel unfamiliar, maybe even uncomfortable, but that doesn’t mean it’s out of reach. It just means your system has been on high alert for a long time, and calm isn’t your norm yet.


But there is another way to live, and your body remembers how to get there. Sometimes it just needs a little help finding the path back.


Calm Isn’t Forced. It’s Allowed.


This is something I say often:


"You don’t have to chase calm. You can gently allow it."


Finding calm isn’t about pretending everything’s okay, or trying to force your body to relax. It’s about creating the conditions where your nervous system feels safe enough to soften.


Here are some ways to begin:


🌿 Start small

Tiny pauses matter. Take your tea somewhere quiet. Notice the way the air feels on your skin. One deep breath before checking your phone. These aren’t fixes, they’re invitations.


πŸ’› Befriend your nervous system

That anxiety, that restlessness, it’s not your fault. Your nervous system is doing what it was designed to do: protect you. Modalities like acupuncture, EFT, breathwork, or gentle grounding techniques can help bring it out of survival mode, slowly and gently.


🎢 Create pockets of peace

You don’t have to overhaul your life. A soft playlist while you cook. Logging off ten minutes earlier. A quiet pause between tasks. These are little anchors that help you reconnect with yourself.


πŸ•ŠοΈ Trust the process

Some days will feel easier than others. That’s not a failure, it’s being human. Healing happens in waves. Progress comes in tiny steps. Be kind to yourself in the middle of it.


The First Time I Truly Felt Calm…

I remember the first time I experienced a deep, grounded sense of calm in my body. It caught me off guard. It almost felt like something was missing, I was so used to holding tension that the absence of it felt strange.


But then I realised… I wasn’t losing anything.


I was gaining something I didn’t know I’d been missing.


Presence. Clarity. Space to just be.


And over time, it became easier to return to that place. Not every day. Not perfectly. But it was possible and that was everything.


You Deserve That Too.


If you’ve been stuck in survival mode for longer than you can remember, I want to gently remind you:


You were never meant to live in a state of constant stress.


Calm is not reserved for other people. It’s for you, too.


If you’re ready to feel more like you again to let your body rest, to quiet your mind, to reconnect with a sense of peace, I’d love to walk that journey with you.


Let’s talk. Let’s explore what’s keeping you stuck and gently find your way forward, together.


You don’t have to do this alone.


πŸ“ Based in George Street, Edinburgh

πŸ’Œ Click here to book a free 30 minutue session

by Nancy Williams-Foley 29 March 2025
Maybe you hold things in until they come out all at once. Maybe you soften your words to keep the peace and then feel invisible afterward. Or maybe you’ve been misunderstood so many times that saying nothing feels safer than speaking up. ο»Ώ I want you to know - this can change. And it doesn't start with finding the perfect words for other people. It starts with how you speak to yourself. The Words You Use with Yourself Matter If the voice in your mind is often critical, doubting, or dismissive, it’s no wonder communication feels hard. When we constantly question ourselves internally, it’s difficult to express ourselves clearly on the outside. But the beautiful thing is - this is something you can gently reshape. Just like any other habit, communication - both outward and inward - is something we learn. And with practice, we can unlearn patterns that no longer serve us and replace them with ways of speaking and listening that feel kinder, more honest, and more grounded. What Happens When Communication Becomes Clearer When you begin to communicate with more clarity and honesty, something shifts. You feel more heard. More understood. And most importantly, more connected to yourself. Some of the things that often follow are: 🌿 Stronger relationships – Misunderstandings reduce, needs are expressed more openly, and connection deepens. 🌿 Emotional release – The pressure of holding everything in softens. 🌿 Greater self-trust – You start to feel more confident in your voice. 🌿 Inner calm – Your inner dialogue becomes gentler, less chaotic, and more supportive. Of course, we all have moments where communication doesn’t come easily. But when that becomes the norm, when you’re walking away from conversations feeling unheard, silencing yourself to avoid conflict, or replaying what you said over and over - it may be time to look at how you're speaking to yourself too. The Link Between Self-Talk and Speaking Up So often, the way we communicate with others mirrors how we communicate internally. If you’ve spent years: – Dismissing your feelings – Doubting your instincts – Silencing what you really want to say …it’s understandable that it feels hard to be open and clear with others. But here’s the truth: Your voice is not too much. Your feelings are not a burden. You deserve to take up space in conversations - both out loud and in your own mind. A Story of Change: Letting the Inner Voice Soften Let me tell you about someone I worked with - we’ll call her Sarah. Sarah grew up in a household where emotions weren’t openly discussed. She learned to keep quiet, to guess what others were feeling, and to avoid conflict at all costs. In her adult life, that turned into people-pleasing. She’d often say yes when she meant no, and when she did speak up, her inner critic would punish her for it. We started with her internal dialogue. She began noticing just how often she was talking herself down, second-guessing everything she felt. And together, we gently rewrote the script. Instead of: “I’m being dramatic,” she began to say: “ My feelings are valid.” Instead of: “I t’s easier to stay quiet,” she began to believe: “ My needs are allowed to matter.” Over time, this shift inside began to ripple outward. Sarah started setting soft boundaries, asking for what she needed, and speaking more honestly in her relationships. And the result? She began to feel seen. One day, she shared a story about finally telling a close friend how something had been making her feel. Her voice shook, but she stayed with it. And her friend really listened. That moment was a turning point. Not because the conversation was perfect, but because it was true . You Can Get There Too If communication feels tangled - if you find yourself walking away from conversations feeling unheard, or if your own mind feels like the loudest critic—I want to gently remind you: It doesn’t have to stay this way. You can learn to: πŸ’› Speak to yourself with kindness πŸ’› Pause and respond with clarity πŸ’› Honour your needs without guilt πŸ’› Trust your voice - because it matters If you're ready to change how you speak to others and how you speak to yourself, I'm here to support you. Whether it's through therapy, EFT, or simply creating space for self-awareness, this kind of healing is absolutely possible. πŸ“ Based in George Street, Edinburgh πŸ’Œ Book a consultation here if you’re ready to explore a gentler, clearer way to communicate, inside and out. You don’t need perfect words. You just need honesty, self-trust, and a little compassion. Your voice is worth hearing. Let’s help you use it.
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